The day didn’t go as I had hoped.
The first Sunday of Advent was swallowed up in busy-ness and here we are–at the end of it already. As I hastily try to put together our Advent readings, something else comes up. I sit on the stairs while the boys brush their teeth, the sound of electric toothbrushes not loud enough to drown out those old voices.
You can’t do anything right. What kind of mother are you?
Tears start to leak and I cover my eyes. I know it’s more than this day. Just too many days of trying to be too many things to too many people.
My Little Man comes up behind and wraps his arms around me.
“You’re the best mommy in the world,” says he, unbidden.
I hug him back, through watery smile.
I turn expanders, clip toenails, and settle boys in. It’s their reading time, but I won’t be joining them this night. I tuck Teddy in with this book, hug Jeffrey into this story. Then I go downstairs to tend the other matter.
Just a bit late, I return for lights out.
There he sits, on a sea of white blanket, with This Book spread out before him. We always read it together…but here he is, hands caressing Living Words alone.
“It’s the first Sunday of Advent,” says he. “And I wanted to read about Jesus. I read Matthew one through seven.”
I turn out the lights and snuggle in beside him. We talk about the words he read in the dark.
And I see.
Sometimes I need to get out of the way so the Holy Spirit has room. I can make all the plans in the world…but His are better.
A joyous Advent Season to you, my friends. May the Spirit move within.