Playdates with God: New York Minute

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We drove ten hours north through hills on fire with the pink flame of Redbuds to arrive in New York City, naked trees, and winter again. You sat in the back seat the entire way, ear buds in, farther away than all the miles that would separate us if you chose the city, if you chose the university we traveled all this way to visit. As we moved along the highway, I would reach back behind me, squeeze your leg, needing to touch you—to feel this invisible string that connects my heart to yours take flesh.

We walked. First the campus and then the city, combing up and down Fifth Avenue like we knew where we were going; our heads full of what we’d seen, what we’d heard—the talk of professors and students and taxicabs and the pushing bodies in Times Square.

I wondered what you were thinking. Could you live this kind of life? Is this what you wanted? Moments accelerated, each step taken faster than the one before, every second filled with motion? I studied your hungry face through the blur of motion.

I saw possibility.

For the first time, panic did not rise in my throat when I imagined you here. Fear did not dog my every move as I realized, you could do this. And you could do it well.

When did you become a man? It’s as if I blinked and when I opened my eyes the years have tumbled forward, lost in time. A New York minute. That’s how fast our time with you has flown. But even as I look up into eyes the same blue as my own, I know that invisible line that tethers us will never be broken.

If I haven’t said it enough, I’m proud of you, son. You make my mama heart shine. And wherever you land come fall and the beginning of this new chapter, I know you’ll do well. I believe in you and all those years of strong foundation we’ve built.

This is what it means to trust in God. To open the hand to the most precious of all we hold. This is faith.

The invisible string that tethers us all to the heart of God.

Every Monday I share one of my Playdates with God. I would love to hear about yours. It can be anything: outside, quiet time. Maybe it’s solitary. Maybe it’s loud and crowded. Just find God and know joy. Click on the button below to add your link. I try to visit a few of your stories every week, so if you are a new visitor, be sure to let me know in the comments so I can welcome you. Grab my button at the bottom of the page and join us.

Laura Boggess

Comments

  1. says

    Laura, we made the same journey recently only from Maine to NY and were finding ourselves suddenly viewing spring after a long winter. I’m also in the process of watching boys walk out the door with that “I’m proud of you, son, but how did we get here so soon?” feeling. Thanks for saying it so well.

  2. says

    Those invisible strings are sturdy ones! Proud of your mama heart being willing to release your baby into the world, Laura. It’s not easy. My youngest is about to graduate from college and take another step deeper into “real” world living. Still takes faith for me to release her there.

  3. says

    I can so relate, Laura. My oldest is getting married in June and he was the best man at wedding this weekend that my husband officiated. It gave us sort of a dry run for Jordan’s big day. When I saw my son walking down the aisle with the maid of honor, I thought “I can still see that two-year-old in his face.” No one else would see it, but his mom! Congrats on your son’s big decision at the “Big Apple!” Whoa! Let the adventure begin!

  4. says

    Laura, this line really resonated, “This is what it means to trust in God. To open the hand to the most precious of all we hold. This is faith.”
    Yes, the letting go. I still do it with my own son….and he’s 38 years old. But we mamas still have to let go and let God be God for them and in them. What an adventure!

  5. Sharon says

    Oh Laura, I need a kleenex. I so remember the *season* that you’re in right now. Letting our (dare I say?) babies fly out of the nest, it’s so very hard. I remember, just like you, wondering where the time flew. It seems to go by so fast. But, rest assured, just like you said, the foundation that we build with our kids lasts a lifetime. And the Lord will watch over them, for He loves them even more than we do.

    May He be especially close to your mama’s heart, and may He bring comfort as you loosen your grip to allow your son to fly!

    GOD BLESS!

  6. says

    Laura,
    Oh, the letting go of what is most precious…how our faith is tested…It made me smile with delight to read your words and to see prayer answered…May God continue to give you and your family peace in this process 🙂

  7. says

    New here! ..so touching! You pave a path for me– my son will venture on his own next year! But it seems they have become young men overnight! And love your description of Times Square! If he chooses NY, its a great, exciting city. I had my career in NYC For 7 yrs, and grew up on Long Island. New York stories are etched in my soul! I wish him the best and bless you mamma fir raising a fine son!

  8. says

    Oh my, this parenting thing we do is such a journey isn’t it? A wrestling through with God to trust deeper. Love you and thinking about you today. You’re doing a good job Mom, hang in there. xxx

  9. says

    What a beautiful message to your son! I have yet to experience a child going off to college (no kids here, yet!), but I imagine that it’s a very scary thing. What a great mom you are for traveling around with him to check out options. Bless you and your family!

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